Criibaby’s Queer Pop Whisks You Away On a Lavender Cloud

In a world that forces queer people to stand up and fight back, Criibaby wants to connect with a sense of gentleness, curiosity and play. The singer-songwriter just released her debut album when i’m alone i feel weightless (Friends of Friends Music), a soothing electropop project with strumming guitars, luminescent synths and layered harmonies that float like clouds over an enchanted garden.

In this sonic cocoon, Criibaby looks back at grief and past trauma and then summons the courage to face herself so she can let go. “The big question that I’m asking is, what is holding you back from actually healing?” says Criibaby on a recent morning at the co-op music studio she helped build in West Berkeley, The Q.

Doc Martens emblazoned with happy and sad faces and long pigtails accentuate Criibaby’s signature look of head-to-toe lavender, from beanie to socks. Sitting cross-legged on a purple shag rug, beneath a set-up of mics and keyboards, our interview starts to feel like sharing secrets at a slumber party. Criibaby discusses her daily tea and meditation rituals that help her ground herself and connect to her feelings.

“I think we all, in our different ways, are escaping something,” she says. “There’s a truth that’s inside of you that has been knocking at the door for a long time and wants to be let out. It’s like a little puppy, you know, it just wants to be able to roam free.”

Music has been a way for Criibaby to unlock those innermost truths. The artist (who uses both she and they pronouns) began writing songs in earnest after the death of a close loved one. Singing provided catharsis and also a place to explore identity. Conscious of the lack of queer representation in pop, Criibaby intentionally wrote lyrics without gendered pronouns, and expressing herself through music helped them own their bisexual and genderqueer identity.

For a long time, Criibaby says she struggled to figure out her gender and sexuality because she didn’t feel aligned with the hypersexualized depictions of bisexual women in media, nor with stereotypes that genderqueer people are always androgynous or masculine. “I think another thing I’m trying to do with this project is be myself and let people know there’s nuance within the queer community, and nuance is important and beautiful,” she says. “We are just as varied as anyone else, you know, there’s no right way to be bi or queer or genderqueer or any of those things.”

Making room for queer people who don’t feel like they fit is also at the center of Criibaby’s approach to live shows. With the pitter-patter of handclaps on “safe” and soft cooing of “oohs” on “always listening,” when i’m alone i feel weightless is more fitting for a meditation retreat than a club. At Criibaby’s album release party at the San Francisco LGBT Center on Sept. 11, the artist has planned a bunch of introvert-friendly activities — a succulent-crafting station and a clothing swap — that she hopes will allow shier attendees to mingle and connect with others.

“I think we need to experience each other’s gentleness and playfulness and in a space where we can truly be ourselves,” they say, noting the uptick in Gen Zers and millennials seeking social spaces that don’t revolve around alcohol.

For Criibaby, using music as a force for healing is also about connecting to one’s childlike sense of wonder. The artist is intentional about cultivating a sense of whimsy for herself and her audience. One way she conjures a feeling of magic on stage is through an electronic instrument she literally dreamt up and built from scratch.

After dreaming that she was playing music in an alien universe by tapping glowing balls of light, Criibaby teamed up with her producer Surfer Dave and roboticist friend Monk to actually build a midi instrument that triggers samples when she touches bubble-like glass orbs that light up with color. The result is otherworldly.

She debuted the orbs last year at South by Southwest, and will have them on display for the audience to play with at SF LGBT Center event. She’ll play them in her Sept. 19 set at THEYFRIEND Nonbinary Cabaret at San Francisco’s Brava Theater.

“I have this extension of my imagination that I’ve brought into real life that only I really know how to play. Wow,” she says. “I think as queer people, we’re used to building our own worlds, you know? But to have a physical manifestation of that is so special to me.”

Criibaby performs live at the SF LGBT Center on Sept. 11 and at THEYFRIEND Nonbinary Cabaret at San Francisco’s Brava Theater on Sept. 19.