It’s been a little over four years since the Bay Area awoke to orange skies, and wildfires continue to rage in California. If you’ve been feeling a sense of climate doom, you’re not alone. Here’s a Perspective from Diane Kung.
I can distinctly recall waking up to orange skies during the pandemic, the outside world filtered in sepia. COVID seemed a lot less threatening than the apocalyptic smoke from multiple wildfires raging throughout California. Since, I have been deeply disturbed by the invisible menace that courses through me, my family, and my fellow human beings. Everywhere, I see plumes of vehicle exhaust. During winter, the scent of burning firewood wafting across my Oakland neighborhood makes me anxious. Sometimes, even the smell of burning toast can be triggering.
In October of 2022, my partner, a non-smoker, was diagnosed with Stage IV lung cancer. While we will never know why he developed the disease, we do know that he carries the EGFR mutation. As recent studies suggest, EGFR-mutated cells can turn cancerous when exposed to airborne particulate matter.
I find myself struggling with feelings of doom as our world grapples with climate change, especially when I am aware of the barriers to solutions. When I see people who keep their cars running, basking in air conditioning or scrolling through their phones, I want to scream in frustration, simultaneously feeling shame for being so judgmental. Sometimes, I feel like my mental health is more challenged by these emotions connected to our imperiled future than my partner’s cancer. I personally try my best to lower my carbon footprint; however, when I think of oil companies, politicians, or even my students who shrug off this issue, I feel like there is so much out of my control.