What Are Your Audio Ofrendas for Día de los Muertos?

Día de los Muertos gives us a yearly opportunity to remember loved ones who have passed away. In honor of the holiday, we provide our listeners with a radio altar. It’s a chance to call in and share testimonials – or audio ofrendas – for those who’ve left us. Have you recently lost a family member, a neighbor, a friend or even a celebrity you admired? Tell us what they meant to you.

Remembering Loved Ones on Dia de los Muertos

Numerous listeners shared heartfelt stories remembering family members, partners, friends and community figures who have passed away.

Here are some of the messages we received:

Gavin wrote: “I lost my best friend and backcountry ski partner this May in an avalanche in Idaho. Terry O’Connor climbed Everest and Denali. He was an exceptional ER doctor who guided our small town through the Covid pandemic. I recently drove around our mountains trying to find some peace and understanding and an answer to the ‘why’ of his death and lost count of the lines we skied together. He was my guide, my brother, my daughter’s godfather, our doctor- to call him a friend falls way short. I don’t let a lot of people into my life where the meat is. Terry got in there early and we dug around in the joy and pain of life behind the walls. Losing someone like Terry is having a chunk of yourself ripped out, shredded, destroyed. And it hurts. I don’t yet know how to live without Terry, but he did show me how to live. And for that, and all that we shared I am and will be forever grateful.”

Sandra wrote: “Armand King Russell was a classical musician and composer. He chaired the music department at the University of Hawaii for many years. We were married for three wonderful decades. He was also a romantic—every time I returned home after even one night away, often to check on my house on the coast, I would find a love note. I saved every one, 96 in all.”

Jan wrote: “The unexpected and sudden loss of a loved one is especially hard, and I have experienced it three times in my life: my daddy when I was 7 of a heart attack, my mother when I was 23 of a medication overdose, and my sister of a tragic work-related accident. To celebrate these lives on Dia de los Muertos makes me feel close to them after all these years.”

Bryan shared a tribute: “Although time has made me forget the sound of your laughter, I will always cherish the laughs we shared, even though it always seemed to only get me in trouble! Thank you for being an older brother – to an older brother that needed an older brother. The hourglass of time moves ever too quickly, but I am grateful to have shared those few grains of time with you.”

Carol included a poem for their partner and wrote: “I’ve never understood the goal of seeking closure after someone dies. I like remembering and being reminded of the people who have been important in my life. The one thing that will always trigger a moment of reminiscence for me is the person’s handwriting. After my partner died in 2014, I was sorting some bank statements, and there on a red folder was his hand written label. Right after that experience, I wrote the poem that follows:

SHARDS (in memory of Jim Sanders 1928-2014)
You are gone.
I know that.
Yet,
today you were here
when I sorted some files.
There
on a red folder
your handwritten label
brought you back
from your quiet sleep
into this room.

Noelle wrote: “I want to honor Jane McAlevey – a labor organizer and scholar of labor issues. She was so smart and at the same time practical about the “how’s” of labor organizing.”

Casey wrote: “This is my first year setting up an ofrenda to remember the many family members I’ve lost in the last 6 years. I’d like to remember my dad. He would say this grace before dinner and I think it encapsulates what he was all about and why I miss him everyday: ‘We pause to remember those who came before us and pledge to learn the lessons of their lives. We celebrate the diversity of those who live in this world with us. We examine our own prejudices as we pray humankind finds mutual understanding and peace in our time. We look to the future for opportunity. We work to protect Mother Earth for our children’s children’s children’s future.’”

Katherine wrote: “Richard Spohn was my husband, my heart, and a North Star for so many. A model for the young in his vision for what democracy means and what our responsibility is within it. He had a great and enduring love, joy and pride in his family – especially his two daughters. His public legacy was as a consumer advocate, as well as his legal work in affordable health care and his groundbreaking work in labor and management relations in Guatemala. He was part of me for more than 30 years.”

Regina wrote: “My nephew Alex just passed away at only 34 years old in a car accident a month ago. Today I remember him with much love for having a beautiful smile and for his beautiful heart. I pray that he is happy wherever he is and to remind him that we love him.”

James wrote: “Last November we lost a wonderful artist, therapist, strong and powerful woman – my ex-wife, Karen Mae Balos. Whether it was drawing, painting, stained glass, sculpture, free-hand paper cuts, ceramics or huge abstract quilts and tapestries, Karen was directly in touch with her enormous creative spirit and extraordinary gifts. Her art is spontaneous, bold, and vibrant. She worked without an inner critic. Her last piece is a large abstract quilt that she made during the pandemic. It is painstakingly hand-stitched with glorious colors and shapes. In September, we produced a three-day retrospective of her art at the Kala Gallery in Berkeley. The only thing we regretted about this show was that she wasn’t there to see it. My son, her many artist friends, and colleagues and I miss her deeply every day. She lives on in all our hearts.”

Perry wrote: “I’d like to take this day and tomorrow to remember those who never made it out of the Darien Gap, lost looking for a better life.”

Sharon wrote: “Our son Terry died in 2017. He was also a father, brother, and life partner. Terry, a chemist with patents to his name, was brilliant, complicated, fiercely loyal and loving, although not always kind. His colleague and friend from Medtronic said, ‘Terry’s device will save thousands of lives.’ That statement took my husband’s and my breath away. His spirit and influences are with us every day, and we see him in the faces of his children. His quirky personality and sense of humor, his affinity for Dungeons and Dragons, his drive to create, explore and share all of that with his children lives on in his family and true friends.”

Rachel wrote: “When my vibrant mother Sara Gray was diagnosed with brain cancer and died 13 months later, I erected an altar in our home that continues to remain a memorial for the last two years. This honoring and celebration has been helpful in the grieving process, shifting the focus from the sadness to the love and life, and keeping her alive in our hearts and home. A special moment to honor the lives of all those who have died from this devastating, aggressive cancer that has had little advances in cure.”

John wrote: “My wife, Erlinda, died 7 years ago, and I have an altar to her memory on Facebook. Following the spirit of Dia De Los Muertos, I secure her memory in the minds of friends and family by periodically posting something about her that they may have forgotten or never knew. And it is so wonderful that I can show pictures of Erlinda to remind them.”

Robin wrote: “I’d like to honor and remember my mom Sharon Burke who just passed in August from dementia. She was a wonderful mother. I feel so fortunate to have had her for so long in my life and that she was able to know my children and that they were able to know her. Her character was so full of life and love. We just lost her favorite cat last week and there is some comfort in knowing they are together. We will miss them both.”

Seema wrote: “I’m in despair as a mother remembering my son Harvin, who passed away at the age of 24. Coincidentally, today [Nov. 1] would have been his 40th birthday. Miss you so much and my heart has a BIG HOLE now. He had the kindest heart, big beautiful smile and sense of humor, and called himself ’Citizen of the world.’ We miss you so much.”