Tesilya Hanauer grew up on a commune deep in a Northern California forest. When she was five, her mother joined a nomadic group of people whose philosophy involved breaking the bond between mother and child. They were called the Shivalila, and they believed that if parental bonds were severed, a communal consciousness might emerge that could eventually transform society. Over the next few years, Tesilya would follow them from California to the Philippines to rural India, hoping always for a glimpse of the mother she once had.
Nicholas DePrey composed the music for this piece.
![Tesilya's mother, Meredith, in India.](https://ww2.kqed.org/news/wp-content/uploads/sites/10/2017/02/Photo1-800x1076.jpg)
![Tesilya with a family in India.](https://ww2.kqed.org/news/wp-content/uploads/sites/10/2017/02/Photo2-800x1060.jpg)
![Meredith, Tesilya's mother, in the garden at Black Bear Ranch around 1976.](https://ww2.kqed.org/news/wp-content/uploads/sites/10/2017/02/Photo3-800x543.jpg)
![Tesilya and her father, Creek, at Black Bear Ranch around 1975.](https://ww2.kqed.org/news/wp-content/uploads/sites/10/2017/02/Photo6-800x1145.jpg)
![3-year-old Tesilya carrying an infant on her back at Black Bear Ranch.](https://ww2.kqed.org/news/wp-content/uploads/sites/10/2017/02/Photo7-800x819.jpg)