Falling Behind in School Hurts. Belonging Can Help Students Trust and Learn

It’s common for students to introduce themselves to reading specialist Belkys Benison as a “non-reader.” Students come into her classroom angry, anxious or feeling incapable because of their struggles in the classroom. These kinds of student reactions reflect how students are made to feel about themselves.

That’s why she makes sure to acknowledge their feelings, past academic experiences and their capacity to learn so she can prepare them to learn.

Students are led to believe that their academic success determines their future success, so when they’re told they’re deficient in skills like reading, it “can be really damaging to their sense of self-worth” and threaten their sense of belonging, said Geoffrey Cohen, a social psychologist  Stanford University professor. He is also author of the book, “Belonging: The Science of Creating Connection and Bridging Divides.”

Benison knows students can feel this way, so she gives them persistent positive feedback and fosters a safe learning environment to slowly build trust with students who may have come into their first lessons reluctant and lacking confidence.

Benison likes to use affirming phrases like “you’re capable of doing hard things,” “hard things are worth doing” or, “I know it’s hard, but you’re not doing it alone.” These reassurances need to be repeated a lot when she begins working with students in order to remove anxiety or de-escalate any stress that might come up during lessons. And of course, she’s there to provide the learning support to ensure the student can achieve their goals.

According to Cohen, these types of positive messages, when conveyed credibly, “can really undo a lot of the damage of these past experiences that these kids come in with.” When re-building trust with students is successful, expectations of those students can also be adjusted to reflect that they are capable of academic success and achievement, said Cohen. This process can help to open students’ “minds to a new way of looking at their academic experience,” he continued.

Fostering belonging during adolescence 

Feeling a sense of belonging is important at any age, but in adolescence, those feelings can be heightened. Sometimes, feedback from a student’s larger culture or community can trigger feelings of inadequacy when belonging isn’t there, according to Andrew Fuligni, the co-executive director of the Center for the Developing Adolescent at UCLA. 

Adolescents are building an identity, which involves discovering things that you are good at, said Fuligni. When students are told that they have fallen behind in a particular skill, it can damage their sense of belonging; the feelings are heightened because adolescents are particularly prone to internalizing the messages they hear.

Many students mistakenly believe that academic ability is fixed rather than a developed skill, said Fuligni. Creating a growth culture in the classroom, especially “cooperative learning situations where kids of varying abilities are working together towards a higher standard,” can help to foster a sense of belonging for students who are behind, Cohen added.

“Generally, remediation just sends a message that you need help and that message can be pretty threatening,” said Cohen. It’s often assumed that “poor performance reflects poor ability but that’s not the case. It’s often a lack of preparation,” he continued.

The role of teachers and adults

Adolescence is a critical developmental period, during which students “are trying to figure out the trustworthiness of institutions, and people like teachers,” said Cohen. For members of marginalized groups, “the extra question is ‘how will they treat people like me?’,” he said.

Adolescents are particularly attuned to figuring out where they fit in and care deeply about social status, and that’s not going to change for that age group. That means adults bear the responsibility of controlling how they respond, and they can help students who are behind have a positive outcome through small acts and comments of affirmation, according to Fuligni.

“Affirming the contributions, the ideas and the values of all of our students really can go a long way,” said Fuligni. When a student’s contributions and skills are affirmed in these small ways, it cultivates a sense of trust and lets them see that they are “valued members of the community.”

Seeing progress

According to Benison, who teaches students up to sixth grade, sharing a student’s reading progress with them can be a helpful way to boost their confidence, and reinforce the trust between student and teacher. Setting very clear goals and allowing students to consistently see their own success helps students to continually build upon their knowledge and skill set, said Benison.

“I teach in a way that they know they’re growing,” she continued. Benison doesn’t share the initial intake information with her students because she doesn’t want students to define themselves by the original data. But she periodically shares students’ progress with them.

When her students make mistakes, Benison takes note and makes necessary adjustments to include that skill in every lesson until that learning is reinforced. According to Benison, allowing students to correct their own work, without the pressure of a grade, helps students to recognize their own growth. In May of each year, Benison takes time to look back to the start of the year with each student to show them how much they’ve learned and grown.

“I know that when I teach them how to read, and I encourage them to do difficult things, I’m not just letting them get through the day, but I’m preparing them for their future,” said Benison.